Do you know your ABCs?

I found this wonderful gem on Discover.

A Poem Beyond Belief by Phil Plait

A is Ad hominem, attacks quite insulting,
They may feel good but no good is resulting.

B is for Bible, they swear it’s all true,
But which version’s right? The Muslim’s, Mormon’s, or Jew’s?

C is Creation, 6000 years past;
But when looked at the evidence is always half-assed.

D is Debunker, it’s said with a jeer.
But we cannot debunk without bunk, that is clear.

E EVP, hearing voices of dead,
but it’s really just patterns of sound you are fed.

F The Face that’s on Mars is really a butte,
Is there on the obverse a giant patoot?

G’s Uri Geller, a spoon he will bend,
Is it magic or powers, or more likely pretend?

H, Healers, adept with a miracle,
Probably would do better with treacle.

I, Ideomotor, the dowser’s director,
It fallaciously points on a randomized vector.

J is Junk science, it’s always reforming,
from alt med to New Age, and anti-global warming.

K is for Karma, you reap what you sow,
but if it’s not coincidence, then how would you know?

L’s Levitation, they claim that they float
but I think it’s just bouncing they’re trying to promote.

M: Mayans said: doom in Twenty Oh Twelve,
In 2013 those predictions we’ll shelve.

N is Nibiru, a planet of vapor,
It never shows up but it looks good on paper.

O: Oxygen water, marks can’t get their fill,
What they don’t understand is that they don’t have gills.

P: Faces in patterns is called Pareidolia,
In clouds it’s mundane but in pastry it’s holier?

Q is for Quacks, their science is lacking,
They’ll sell you snake oil with the government’s backing.

R: Repressed memories, bad things you’ve forgotten,
But it’s really the premise behind it that’s rotten.

S: Sylvia Browne, who randomly guesses,
That people believe her is why it depresses.

T’s for Trudeau, and the trash that he’s sellin’,
But credit card fraud? FTC: “He’s a felon.”

U, Unidentified, the definition’s specific,
But it doesn’t stop cranks thinking they’re scientific.

V is Vaccines, which clear germs up quick,
But some folks don’t like them, they fight little pricks.

W’s for Woo-woo, Randi’s favorite word choice,
And who’ll argue with him? He gave us our voice!

X is for Xenu, scientologist’s Satan,
Give us all of your money, your engrams we’ll straighten.

Y is for Yeti, the Bigfoot, Sasquatch,
A whole lot of nonsense without a single hair swatch.

Z is for Zetans, those E.T. mind readers,
But they disappeared as they followed the Lieder.

Note: Hey, I didn’t write it. Gripe to Phil Plait.